And that's who i am
by Rennergirl11
Summary: What i imagine Natasha's posts would be like. "What's wrong Red? You scared of a little storm?"
1. Eating Disorders

A/N: I absolutely love these tumblr posts things and so that's what they are. Hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: Don't own anything. Not even the socks on my feet.

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*I have an eating disorder*

Clint watched her as she bent down to look at the scale closer. "What are you doing?" HE asked, causing her to jump.

"Don't be an ass." She rolled her eyes. She stood straight up but kept her eyes glued to the scale.

"You weighing yourself again?" He asked. "That's the fourth time since last night that I've caught you."

"So what?" She shrugged. She stepped off the scale and looked at him, hands on her hips.

"You hungry?" She shook her head, biting down on her lip. "You sure?"

"Yes Barton." She growled

"I was just trying to feed my partner. Didn't want her to get hurt or hungry or anything." Clint said. He backed away, hands thrown up in a

sign of defeat.

"Fuck you." She said, glaring at her coldly.

"I know that you'd love to Tasha." He said before she slammed the bathroom door in his face. "What was that for?"

"For being an ass." She said, turning the shower on, though she had no intention of a shower at the moment.

She lifted her shirt up, staring at her stomach. She had been under Clint's "careful" eye for six months, which involved a lot of hamburgers, ice

cream, and doughnuts trying to add some fat on her stomach.

Though every bone was still visible, it was obvious she had gained a few pounds thanks to having food stuffed down her throat at every

moment.

She didn't like the way she felt with the few extra pounds. She could finally pinch her sides and it not leave a bruise, but she didn't like it.

She bent over the toilet, and stuck her finger down her throat before she removed it. She felt the puke rise up her throat and she sat her

head on the end of the toilet seat, puke launching into the toilet.

"Tasha?" Clint knocked. "You okay?"

"Fine." She said, feeling more puke come up. When she did it, she felt ten times better. It made her feel in control of the one thing she had

never been able to choose what to do with.

Her breathing hiked as she burped softly, more food coming up with it.

She was absolutely feeling better, about to stick her finger back in her mouth so she could be done with the icky feeling from everything she

had eaten when Clint burst into the bathroom. "Natasha!" He said his voice as serious as it had ever been. "Stop it!"

She looked up at him, a confused look on her face.

"Don't you dare stick that finger in your mouth." Clint said, pointing his finger at her.

"Just go away." She whispered, placing her forehead on her arm.

"No." He said and Natasha realized, he never said no. He wasn't going to let her try to persuade him of thinking differently. "You are going to

stop this shit."

She flipped him off.

Clint grabbed her wrists. "You are NOT doing this young lady." He said. "You are so much better than this."

She rolled her eyes, trying to pull her wrists away.

"Listen to me Tasha." He said, bending down to her level. "You are an amazing mess of crazy beautifulness that has red hair. Truth be told,

you're the first partner that hasn't tried to kill me."

"Yet." She said quietly, glaring up at him.

"And I know you don't like attachments, I understand that. I don't really either." His gray eyes melted into hers. "But when I'm stuffing

pancakes and burgers and doughnuts down your throat, it's not because I like big girls."

She rolled her eyes.

"The reason I do it Tash, is because I see how much you hurt when someone hits you in your stomach, nothing protected by fat." He said.

"And I don't need my best friend hurt."

She shook her head, laughing softly. "I'm not your best friend."

"As far as I am concerned, you most definitely are." Clint said. He reached over her head and flushed the toilet. "No more of this, okay?" His

eyes begged her.

She nodded as he wrapped her in his arms. He sung something in her ear, something from America that she never understood.

The last thing she heard before she slipped in unconsciousness in his strong, familiar, warm arms was "And it's dark in the cold December. But

I got you to keep me warm. If you're broken, I will mend you. And I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on."


	2. Thunderstorms

A/N: This is multi-chapter story. I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: Don't own anything that you recongnize.

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*I fear thunderstorms*

It was really a stupid thing to be afraid of, being that she worked with the God of Thunder. And they always wondered why she couldn't stay in a room with him by herself.  
"I do not like this game!" Thor yelled, slamming his dry erase board down.  
Natasha jumped, ever so slightly.  
"What's wrong Little Red?" Tony asked. "You scared of a little storm?"  
Natasha glared at him, but didn't answer. She held onto her dry erase board for dear life.  
"Thor, not everything we do you'll understand." Clint said. "Just like how we didn't know what a bilge snipe was."  
"It is not that hard to understand Bird man." Thor said, gripping Mjolnir in his large hand.  
"Yes, but there's no need to get upset about it." Clint said.  
Natasha put her hand on his arm and looked at him. Her eyes bore into his and he shut his mouth.  
"Aww. Look. The COUPLE of master assassians are having their own private conversation. How sweet." Tony said.  
Natasha glared at him.  
"Stark, just leave them alone." Steve said. "Let's just get back to this game."  
Natasha pressed her back against the loveseat, that she was sitting on with Clint.  
She let out a small huff as Tony started arguing with Steve. "I am dead." She muttered under her breath, which Clint heard, causing him to laugh. "Don't make me take out the batteries Bird Boy."  
Clint stopped laughing and looked at her. "You wouldn't." He said quietly.  
"Yes, I would." Natasha said.  
All of a sudden, Mjolnir was thrown across the room, causing a loud boom.  
Natasha squeaked, hiding her head behind Clint's back.  
"Tasha." Clint said, turning his head awkwardly to look at her. "It's okay."  
She shook her head, eyes filled with fear.  
"Tash." He moved her from behind him. "It's just a little thunder." He sat her in his lap. "Just take a breath. We're not in Oklahoma. We're in New York. Take a breath."  
Natasha nodded but soon another thunder clap exploded through the tower, causing her to bury her face into his neck. "Make it go away." She cried quietly.  
"Thor." Clint said, causing the god to look at him.  
"What man bird?" Thor asked.  
"Can you please stop?" Clint asked.  
"Why?" He looked at Clint.  
"Tash." Clint said quietly in her hair and she picked her head up slightly. "You're scaring her."  
"How am I scaring her?" Thor asked. "I do nothing."  
"She's scared of thunderstorms." Clint said. "Just please stop before she kills me trying to hide from it."  
"How is she scared of thunder?" Bruce asked.  
"A mission went bad in Oklahoma. There was a huge storm and the safe house we were in got hit by a tornado." Clint said. "She's terrified now."  
"I'm not terrifed." Natasha argued in a small voice. "I just don't like it."  
"I had no idea Lady Romanoff." Thor said. "I apologize for the wrong doing."  
"It's fine Thor." Her voice cracked, making all the guys look at her oddly.  
"You never do that." Tony said.  
"I do when it storms." She said quietly. "I hate it when it storms." She placed her face back into the crick of his n


	3. Better Than Me

*My Best Friend's Better Than Me*

"Carolyn, get in here!" She called as a loud thunder clap sounded outside the small safe house.  
The ten-year old ran up to the front porch, her two cats following her. "Yes ma'am?"  
"They're calling for a big storm." She said. "I want you inside."  
"Yes ma'am." Carolyn said as the two cats walked into the house. "Where's Foreman?"  
"He's in there with Mr. Clint." Natasha said.  
"That's not a good idea. It's Foreman and Mr. Clint vs. Wilson and House." Carolyn said.  
"I'm guessing you really love House." Natasha said.  
"Yep. I love that show." Carolyn said as they walked in.  
Sirens started going off and Natasha looked over at Carolyn.  
"It's just the siren." Carolyn explained. "It goes off when they get jumpy."  
"Jumpy about?" Natasha asked.  
"A tornado." Carolyn said like it was the most normal thing in the world.  
Clint looked out the kitchen window. "Please tell me there's a basement like thing in this house." Clint said, removing his finger from the blinds.  
"Ya. It's really small, but there is." Natasha said.  
"Okay." Clint said, opening the fridge. "Tasha, take Carolyn and the animals down there, I'll be there in a second."  
"Clin-"  
"Tasha." His blue-gray eyes met her green ones. "Go."  
Natasha nodded and became scared when she saw the panic in Clint's eyes. "Come on Carolyn."  
"It's not gonna be bad." Carolyn said.  
"I don't care. Get in the basement." Natasha said, picking up Wilson and House. "Come on Foreman."  
Carolyn opened a door and walked down concrete steps to a small basement, no bigger than the bathroom.  
Natasha shut the door behind her and let go of the cats and walked down the steps, taking in the small room. It was dark and musty and tiny. And she never liked those three words together.  
She stood there as Carolyn sat on the ground, Foreman laying his head in her lap, while House and Wilson balled up against Foreman.  
The door creaked open and Clint came down, jugs of water in his hands.  
"What are you doing?" She asked.  
"I'm getting prepared." He said, placing them on the floor before going back upstairs.  
"Carolyn, stay right here." She ordered the little girl before following after Clint. "Cli-"  
"Tasha. I told you to stay downstairs." Clint said, coming into the room with blankets and pillows.  
"What is happening?" She asked, the fear causing her Russian accent to come out.  
"There's tornado clouds." Clint said. "It may be nothing, but I don't want to take any chances."  
"What can I do?" She asked.  
"Get those boxes in the floor and take them down." Clint ordered.  
"Yes sir." She nodded. She picked up the boxes as a loud crack of thunder caused the house to rumble. The house became very dark, causing Natasha to jump. "Clint?"  
"I'm right here." He said, holding a flashlight out to her. "Get downstairs. Now."  
"Clin-" She said as it thundered again.  
"Go. I'll be there in a second." Clint said.  
She picked up the rest of the boxes and went down the steps.  
"Natasha?" She heard Carolyn ask.  
"I'm right here sweetheart." Natasha said, her voice cracking.  
Clint came down the stairs, a matress with him.  
"What is this for?" Natasha asked.  
"I want you in that corner." Clint ordered. "Go."  
Natasha pulled Carolyn up and the animals followed. "What are you doing?"  
"I'm protecting you." Clint said.  
"I'm not letting you do anything by yourself." Natasha said.  
"Listen to me Red." Clint grabbed her face. "It's my turn to protect you from these things."  
"Cl-"  
"No arguing young lady." Clint said. "Sit in the corner."  
"But Cli-" She was cut off as he kissed her. She looked up at him. "What was that for?"  
"It got you to shutup, didn't it?" He said as a loud noise startled her. It was like a roar was in the house. "Get in the corner." She sat down next to Carolyn.  
"I'm protecting you." Clint said. "You protect her." Clint laid the matress over them, acting as a shield.  
"What's this for?" Natasha asked.  
"It's to keep you guys from getting hit." Clint said.  
"Then why are you on the other side?" She asked.  
Clint grabbed her hand with one of his and kissed it, before letting her grip onto it for dear life.  
"Cli-" She was interrupted as a loud mechanical like sound ripped through the house, causing Clint to push down on the matress harder.  
The last thing Natasha remembered was getting hit by something.

"Babe?" She blinked open her green eyes, causing Clint to smile. There was a cut on his neck and on his arm.  
"What happened?" Natasha asked.  
"You got hit." Clint said. "You'll be okay." He placed his hand on the side of her face and rubbed her cheek with his calloused thumb.  
"Where's Carolyn?" Natasha asked.  
"She's assessing the damage." Clint nodded up the stairs. "EVAC in 13."  
"What happened?" She asked.  
"Safe house's in ruin." Clint said. "It got hit with a tornado."  
Natasha groaned and for the first time, she realized she was on the matress. "How'd I get on this?"  
"I put you on it." Clint said.  
"Why can't I feel my leg?" She asked.  
"It got hit." Clint said. "It's gonna be fine. It's just kinda swollen."  
"It's still attached?" She asked.  
"Yes." Clint said with a small smile. "It's still attached."  
"Good." She said, shutting her eyes.  
"Tasha?" He asked.  
She opened her eyes and reached up towards him. "What are you doing?She grabbed his hearing aide from his ear and played with it in her hands.  
"What are you doing?" He asked.  
"I'm telling you something." She mouthed.  
Clint rolled his eyes.  
"I want to thank you for saving me. As many times as you have." She said. "And I love you for that."  
Clint smirked at her as she placed the hearing side back into his ear awkwardly.  
"You're better than me." She said, grabbing his hand.  
"Tasha." He said, eyebrow raised. "Don't."  
"You are." She said. "You are." She said before she closed her eyes, darkness over taking her.


	4. Beachhouse

A/N: Please read and review. It makes me work faster.

Disclaimer: Once again, i dont own anything. I haven't magically married Jeremy Renner overnight or anything.

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*I want a beachhouse*

"You would not believe it though Clint." She said as she threw the box back onto the shelf. "I mean, it was on a bluff. And it over looked the ocean."  
"You hate the ocean." He reminded her from the other side of the shelf.  
"I know, but," She sighed. "It was so pretty. It just, you know, the smell of the sea-"  
"You hate the smell of the sea." Clint said.  
"But there was such a dramatic view and-"  
"You hate dramatic stuff Tasha." He said, moving some boxes so he could see her.  
"Clint, you should have seen it though. It was beautiful! And I-"  
"You hate beautiful things." Clint said, pulling a new box down.  
"Now you're just being an ass." She said. "But it was breathtaking. I literally, lost my breath."  
"Maybe because Stark tried to make out with you." Clint said. "You were just so amazed that someone like Anthony Edward Stark wanted to kiss you and not some loser."  
"Named Clinton Frances Barton." Natasha walked to the other side of the shelf. "Stop being such an ass."  
"Stop making it so easy to be one." Clint winked at her.  
"Creep." She pushed away from him. "I'm just saying. Happiness is a warm beachhouse, Clint Barton."  
"You know, you also said that about bubble baths, ice cream, chocolate, guns, sex, and let's not forget. Me." Clint said.  
Natasha rolled her eyes. "I'm telling you. One day. I'm gonna own one. And you're not invited over." She stuck her tongue out at him. "Suck it biatch."


	5. White Shirts

A/N: This one was a little awkward to write because my dad kept on trying to read it. Sorry for the pace at the beginning but I kinda rushed slightly. Hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own one thing and one thing only. My BlackHawk posters that hang up in my room. Anything else though, nope.

*I get turned on by white shirts*

"Are we really training right now?" Natasha groaned, following after Clint.

"Yes. Come on." Clint said, turning the light on.

"Why?" She asked, letting out a groan.

"Because, we haven't been training in days." Clint said. "And you, young lady, are getting harder to hoist up."

"So I'm getting fat?" She growled at him.

"That is not what I fucking meant." Clint turned to face her. "You haven't been working and so I have to work harder to get you up without dropping you because your muscles aren't reacting like they normally do."

She rolled her eyes and kicked off her shoes. "Fine then." Natasha said, pulling her jacket off, revealing her stomach and her sports bra. "Come on "Healthy boy" Come at me."

"Tasha, breathe." Clint said, pulling off his jacket.

Natasha's breathing hitched as she looked at him. She bit down on her lip and silently cursed herself.

"Tasha, you okay?" Clint asked.

"Um, I'll be right back." She ran out of the room and down the hall to the bathroom. "Fuck." She said quietly, looking at herself in the mirror. "Get it together Romanoff."

"Tasha." She heard Clint outside the door. "You sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine." She said, throwing water on her face. "Hold on."

She opened the door slowly and looked at Clint, who had a concerned look on his face. "What Barton?" She asked, pushing past him. "You want to train, let's fucking train."

She stood on the mat, staring over at Clint, fists up. "Come at me."

"You sure?" Clint asked.

"Yes." She said, trying to avoid eye contact. "Come at me."

Clint lunged for her and grabbed ahold of her. She wrapped her legs around his neck and brought him down to the ground. "So you still have it in you, huh Red?" Clint said, a smirk on his face.

"Shut up." She said, standing back up. "Come at me again."

He lunged again, but this time he stopped her from wrapping her legs around him. He pushed her down into the mat and stared her down. "Why won't you keep eye contact?"

She moved her head to the side, avoiding him.

"Natasha, tell me." He said.

She shook her head, staring over at the wall.

"I know something's up." Clint said. "You like this don't you?"

"Like what?" She asked.

"You like being dominated by me." He said. "That has to be what it is. You're turned on by it. That's weird."

"No, I'm not." Natasha said.

"Then why are you wet?" he asked.

Natasha whimpered slightly as his hand traveled down her body, close to her thigh.

"Why Natasha?" He asked, breathing on her neck, causing her body to shiver.

She bit down on her lip, looking up at his blue eyes, not wanting to look at him.

He kissed her neck, causing a small moan to escape her lips. "What's wrong Romanoff?"

She tried to roll away from him, but he had her pinned to the ground.

"What do you want Natasha?" Clint asked quietly.

She whimpered as she felt him press against her thigh.

"What do you want?" He asked.

She rolled them over so she was above him, elbows pressed down on his shoulders. She ran her hand under his white shirt and clawed his chest with her fingernails. "What do you think?" She growled, her voice low and seductive.

"I think you want some of this white shirt action." Clint said.

"You caught me." She said as he rolled them over so he was back on top.

"And I'm never letting you go." Clint said, biting down on her shoulder, causing her to arch her back.

She growled as he slid his hand closer to her core. "God Clint." She heard the doors open and she froze. She stretched her head and saw nothing but buff muscles under a white shirt. She moaned slightly. "Fuck."

Clint pulled off of her and sat up slightly on his knees, his body still over hers.

"Sorry." Steve said as a blush grew on his face.

"It's fine." Clint said, pulling her up to her knees.

"I thought that no one was up this early." Steve said.

"Well I wouldn't be up if it wasn't for this moron." Natasha said, her breathing still heavy.

"Oh, well." Steve said. "I'll go back."

"No. I was just leaving." Clint said, standing up, leaving Natasha alone in the room with Steve.

"Ma'am." Steve said as he picked up a punching bag, his muscles rippling under the white t-shirt.

"Captain." Her voice quivered and she had to bite down on her lip to keep herself from jumping on him.

"Can you do something for me?" Steve asked.

"Why not?" She asked, voice cracking.

"Come over here and hold onto this for just a second." He said.

Natasha nodded and stood up, walking over to him.

"Here." He placed her in front of him, grabbing her arm to position her to hold the bag.

She leaned back against him as his large hands took ahold of her, feeling her body starting to cave in his touch.

He leaned forward to grab something when she turned and pushed him to the ground, forcing him to the mat.

"Ma'am, what are you doing?" Steve asked.

Natasha put her knees on the side of his hips, placing her hands next to his head.

The doors pushed open and she turned and saw Clint, eyebrow raised. "Natasha."

"Coming." Natasha called, kicking herself off the ground. "Gotta keep up Captain."

"What?" Steve asked.

"Gotta stay on your toes Rogers." Natasha said, grabbing her jacket off the floor.

Steve stood and stared as she walked out the door.

When the door closed behind her, she grabbed ahold of Clint's shirt and pushed him into the supply closet next to the gym. She slammed him up against the wall. "God, you boys and white shirts."


	6. Ever Love Me

Disclaimer: Don't own anything.

*I don't believe anyone would ever truly love me*

"There's red in my ledger. And I'd like to wipe it out." He nodded beside her though he knew something was off of what she had said.

There was an unknown truth throughout the air of the small room. The silence was filled with the feeling of home and the last words Loki had said to her

**_Is this love, Agent Romanoff?_**

**_Love is for children. I owe him a debt. _**

She spit back, that's what she had been trained to do. But was it true anymore?

"Tasha." Clint whispered quietly, causing her to look into his steel blue eyes.

"I thought I lost you." She said quietly, her voice cracking.

"You're never gonna lose me Tasha." Clint said, wrapping her up in his arms. "I'm gonna take care of you."

She tensed slightly has his arms wrapped around her.

**_I won't kill Barton. Not until I make him kill you. Slowly, intamently, in every way he knows you fear._**

Though she was terrified the Loki controlled Clint would come back, she couldn't push away from him. He was safe and next to her. And the way it was supposed to be.

"I'm not gonna let anyone hurt the people I love." Clint said in her hair, causing her to smile.


End file.
